I believe physical media serves a priceless function right now to preserve cinema history in a way that streaming services, by and large, are not; and now Synapse Films have done their part by creating a 4K restoration on Blu-ray of one of the most important films ever made, Hot Dog…the Movie (1984), supplemented by an almost hour-long documentary called, of course, Hot Dog…the Documentary. Criterion is great, but they have their blind spots: for example, nowhere in their mammoth box set of Ingmar Bergman films is there a Chinese downhill, nor a single Shannon Tweed sex scene, not even in Hour of the Wolf, which sounds kind of like the name of that Duran Duran song which features prominently in Hot Dog…the Movie. Not to be confused with Hamburger: The Motion Picture (1986) – though you might get them confused, since they both feature Buddy Hackett’s son Sandy – Hot Dog brings to the big screen the world of ski competition. Made at the height of the 80’s craze for teen sex comedies and slobs vs. snobs battles, the film also races toward the head of the pack with plentiful female nudity, wanton partying, ethnic humor, and underdog pranks. Also, it is called Hot Dog…the Movie, so it has an edge on the lot. The new restoration is of the recently discovered “Producer’s Cut,” which is a few minutes longer than the theatrical release, and which played at Chicago’s Cinepocalyse festival last year.
Harkin Banks (Patrick Houser, in blue) meets Dan O’Callahan (David Naughton) and his gang of skiers, including Squirrel (Frank Koppala) and Kendo (James Saito).
The film begins, oddly enough, as a shaggy dog love story, as sweet-natured country boy Harkin Banks (Patrick Houser) picks up a cynical teenage hitchhiker on her way to San Francisco, Sunny (Tracy Smith, Bachelor Party). He’s on his way to the Squaw Valley Ski Resort in Lake Tahoe, the real-life site of the 1960 Winter Olympics, where he hopes to compete for a trophy. The film takes its time getting to the mountain, presenting itself as a straight-up romance, so you might be fooled into thinking you’re watching the wrong movie. But upon arrival the two hardly see each other, as Harkin falls in with a crowd of skiing misfits led by the gregarious, day-drinking Dan O’Callahan (David Naughton, An American Werewolf in London). Dan used to be a big name in downhill skiing, but he’s been eclipsed by the arrogant Austrian skier Rudi (John Patrick Reger), who wins the trophy year after year, largely because the competition is funded by European sponsors. Harkin may be a nobody, but he quickly makes a name for himself on the slopes thanks to his freestyle “hot dog” skiing. This attracts the attention of the most desired woman on the mountain, Sylvia (Playboy Playmate Tweed), who seduces Harkin into her hot tub before a jealous Sunny falls into the arms of Rudi – even though she called him “Adolf” in the first reel. What follows is more skiing, a few eyebrow-raising jokes that you wouldn’t find in a modern comedy, more sex, yet more skiing, and one scene I have to admit to finding very funny, a gloves-off hockey match with Rudi and his gang that’s always a few inches from turning into an all-out brawl. The finale, a Chinese downhill race among all the major players, is part sports movie climax, part Loony Tunes. It would also be shamelessly copied in Hot Dog‘s many bastard offspring (Ski Patrol, Ski School, Ski School 2), even in the much superior Better Off Dead (1985).
Skiing!
I have a soft spot for snowed-in movies, and also for 80’s teen sex comedies. Though this film pushes the definition of the latter, it’s pretty raunchy for its type, spending an inordinate amount of time at a wet T-shirt contest early on; and Tweed, who would go on to become the siren of 90’s Cinemax movies (and Mrs. Gene Simmons), is gorgeous and charismatic in this rare multiplex appearance. The comedy is of the slapstick, go-broad-or-go-home variety, though Naughton, in a supporting role that looks a lot more fun to play than the lead, brings some welcome charm. As for the lead, Patrick Houser gets to sing a couple of original country songs which are about as fun to sit through as a public radio pledge drive – but he’s fine in the role of innocent country boy, too naïve to figure out why the ladies are so interested in him. Undoubtedly, a special shout-out should go to the professional skiers who take up so much footage that you get to know their faces pretty well, perhaps better than the actors they’re stunt doubling. Hot Dog…the Documentary makes it clear that this film may have been much more fun to shoot than it is to watch, documenting how some of the wilder moments are taken directly from the experiences of writer/producer Mike Marvin, and how that wet T-shirt contest – based on a memory of Marvin’s in Park City, Utah – really did become a bacchanal while the cameras rolled. But taken with a couple of beers and as a vicariously experienced 80’s party on the slopes, Hot Dog delivers (…a Movie).
